alright, i don't have fancy words tonight because words just aren't working with me to try and explain this. so let's be blunt, shall we?
i currently live with 8ish (virtually 9) stunning humans. they've been there for me through seizures, through trauma, through grief, and through mood swings. they've carried me up stairs, down stairs, to my room, to the bathroom, and helped me argue with emts so that i didn't have to ride in the ambulance because some schmuck called 911 again. they've sang to me, told me stories, made up raps for me, shared corny jokes with me, and made me laugh until my sides ached and i gasped for air. they did all sorts of annoying things like forget to change the toilet paper when it runs out or put the spoons in the wrong spot or tell me to go lay down when i don't want to. all in all, they really, really love me well. and tonight they threw me one heck of a dance party. picture bacchanalia craziness void of alcoholic beverages and sex. we had dance offs. we grew an interpretive dance flower. we looked like rejects from the sharks and the jets on a b-stage showing of westside story.
it.
was.
a w e s o m e.
seriously folks, at one point they raised me up on their shoulders and chanted "nicolle!" over and over. then we circled up, linked arms and swayed while belligerently bellowing out every 3rd lyric to piano man. at least we got the chorus down.
i can't begin to express how much i love these people, which puts a significant downer on this whole moving thing. gah. but man oh man, if you're able to find something like this, if you can find a group of humans who love you in a way that you start to become human too, sink you're teeth in and don't let go without a fight.
who knows if all of you read this thing or not, but here are my, uh, farewell words? i figure it'll get around to you all one way or another.
lauren, i knew i loved you as soon as that one kid farted at the bob hartley conference and neither one of us could be "adult" about it. thank you for just "getting it" without me having to try and explain.
paul, i figured out why i associate mumford and sons with you. it's that whole layered depth thing. you mysterious depth-filled guy you.
bethany, i love you even when mommy beth takes hold. lovely is still your ultimate description [insert kissy noise].
tyler, if you tell on me to tiffany one more time i'm going to give you a real reason to try and get me in trouble. thanks for reminding me to yearn for God to move.
tiffany, your husband is a pansy. you're pretty much the reason why i decided it was okay to be as weird as i possibly wanted to be.
heather, if i could i would give you all the high-waisted skirts and vintage earrings that you would ever want, and then some. beauty becomes you.
luke, i refuse to be sappy with you in a semi-public arena. you make me cry enough as it is. (thank you.)
jennifer, its okay i'll hold your hand if you really want me to, but i don't know what bobby will think. freaking-a, you are stunning.
sir robert, i'm glad you decided we could be friends even though i'm a girl. may the force be with you.
thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. did i mention thank you? you guys are my favorites. and remember, dano has FOUR bathrooms in case you decide to take me up on my offer to move the entire community ;).
This made me cry.
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